A Short Note To Madonna Badger

Dear  Madonna,

I see you’re in the news again. I’ve thought about you with a heavy, heavy heart many times over these past months. Back in late December, I could not get my mind off what I knew were the depths of darkness and unfathomable agony that must have tortured you with every breath you took.

It is good, this thing you’re doing, suing the officials in Stamford. With the horror of your family’s loss, I never thought about this additional nightmare, this further violation, this unauthorized devastation of whatever of your possessions from Shippan Avenue were left in the charred rubble. Hopefully this action will give some vent to your pain as well as reassert the rights that were stripped from you, as was everything else you owned and loved.

I hear you are gone from Stamford, the area that can do nothing but bring you pain with every view, every encounter, and every cloud in the once-blue sky. It was everything once safe and familiar. But that which was safe was nothing but a sham and everything familiar became unbearably monstrous. I hope you are somewhere very different from Stamford: different climate, different geography, maybe even different hemisphere.

As a woman, as a mother, I embrace you, as do countless others who have never met or even seen you beyond the photos in the media. Wherever it is you are, I pray you are being comforted with strong and caring hands and hearts.

In the meantime, know that thousands of us are here with hearts that ache and souls that only wish they could put back the pieces and turn back the hands of time.

With love,
From All of Us

Madonna Badger: Please Keep Breathing

Madonna Badger’s horrific Christmas Day fire is back in the news as the contractor’s insurance company does not want to pay out for claims or lawsuits due to his company’s role in the fire. Whatever on that one, but let it be said, I am not a fan of insurance companies.

But this post is not about the insurance company. It’s about Madonna, because once again, as the fire raises its ugly head, the gun-slingers and crucifiers are out in full force, tossing about their self-aggrandizing rhetoric. Here are a few examples from The New York Post:

“If Madonna Badger or Michael Borcina had any decency in them, they would both do the right thing and commit suicide. Their greed and stupidity caused this horror, killing young kids and old people. Yet, the two of them continue to walk the earth, pretending that they are actually civilized humans.”

This one is about Madonna’s contractor-friend:

“lying, cheating, incredibly dumb freaking wop bastard should be drawn and quartered and experience a slow, painful death.”

And more:

“BOYFRIEND AND MOTHER SHOULD BOTH BE IN JAIL….”

“This guy is at best shady and criminally negligent and at worst, the most vile murderer of 3 children… that the MOTHER is sticking by this guy tells me all I need to know re where the priorities of these two were and what led up to the horrific events of that night… horrific umtimely death of yet more angels…”

“The story stinks to high heaven. I think the contractor and the wife deliberately set the fire, just didn’t expect to kill anyone. Obviously this contractor has friends in the town, thus the bulldozing of the house and destruction of the evidence within a day of the fire. No one in their right mind would take hot embers from a fire and leave them in a paper bag – in the house. The State of Connecticut needs to appoint an investigator.”

Many more comments adorn the pages of yesterday’s Post, and to be fair, many of them are in supportive.  As for the critical ones, I am not religious, but I always hold true to the story of the woman who was caught committing adultery and Jesus then said  “let he who is without sin, cast the first stone.”

Why does this story haunt me so? I’ve asked myself that a hundred times, and I am pretty sure the answer lies in that I was also a single mother bringing up young children, a single mother who dated, who tried to balance work, home, child care and nurturing, and tons of other things. I made mistakes. I made one major mistake:  I married a man who did the unthinkable, and that I will have to take with me to my dying day. I suffer with the agony of that, but I can’t even imagine Madonna, how she copes, how she lives, how she breathes.