Soft Boiled Eggs

soft_boiled_eggI was on the phone with my father this morning and he told me he was eating a soft-boiled egg. I told him I loved soft-boiled eggs. He said, “I’ll make you one.”

Someday … not tomorrow.

Tomorrow my father is having major, life-threatening surgery. He is having 2 feet of colon removed. He has a pacemaker. He is 88.

But – he is vital, robust, lucid and a delightful, loving man.

His wife, my stepmother, and I are speaking only in terms of pleasantries because to do otherwise will be to breakdown. We are otherwise close. I love her.

All week – morbid thoughts have sunk my naturally ebullient, positive self.  My thoughts spark reservoirs of un-fallen tears that I struggle to choke back but that blind me.

All week – he has been his naturally ebullient, positive self. Although today I heard a hint of the fear that must surely be strangling his psyche.

Tonight I will pack my bag: computer, books, tablet and gum – lots of gum, gum to give focus and and act as an outlet for energy that wants to come out screaming but can’t.

Tomorrow it begins – 7:30, the first surgery of the morning – a good thing, he laughs, the surgeon will be rested and the instruments will be clean.

Tomorrow when I wish him well before they wheel him away on the gurney, I will remind him that I’m holding him to his promise to make me soft boiled eggs. I will tell him that I love him.

About

An author, a teacher, a candlestick maker? I am lucky enough to have followed my muse through a most eclectic life of many careers, many interests, and many friends and liasions. Two beautiful children, now grown and one their own, several books -- the penultimate accomplishment dream come true, a hores trainer, a college professor, and a stint in corporate America to validate my feelings that I never, ever want to go there again. So I donned my ruby slippers and dared to take those different paths, those diverging paths, and that has made all the difference! (Thank you, Robert!)

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2 comments on “Soft Boiled Eggs
  1. iammeemaw says:

    How did it go? Hope you are ok

    • madmuser says:

      Thank you so much for your concern. The surgery went well, though he had a rough second day post-op. He seems to have the corner for the better now. He’s a tough old bird. Love you for asking…

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